Joke of Today

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The pilot felt a gun sticking in his back, and a voice hissed in his ear, "Take me to London."
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6 z1 e* ?9 |1 v; Q( J"But we are going to London." said the pilot.
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$ e" F1 ?. _- q  y) d0 f"I know. But I've been hijacked to Cuba twice before, so this time I'm taking no chances."

(From Internet)

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take no chances  
不冒险
力求万全

mondfluss

Penguinchen

But how? I think the pilot know the direction better when we are deep in the sky. hehe..

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A man is speeding down a narrow mountain road, when a woman comes hurtling round the corner. He swerves to avoid her, but as she passes she leans out the window and screams 'PIG!'
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Astonished, the man turns and yells back, 'BITCH!' as he reaches the bend and crashes into a pig.

4 F3 n: S" K! Q/ s(From Internet)

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Joke of Today

One evening，in the midst of dinner preparation，our 10 yearold daughter asked，“Mom my， what's puberty？”My wife was rushed at the moment，so she suggested that Peggy look up the word in the dictionary，after which they could talk about it.
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A few minutes later，Peggy returned.Her mother asked what the dictionary had said.“Puberty means，”announced Peggy，“the earliest age at which a girl is able to bear children.”
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“What do you think of that？” my wife asked.
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0 M: [$ I% Y, g" p4 l  F  @& S“I'm not sure，” Peggy replied.“I've always been able to bear children.It's adults I can't bear.”

(From Internet)

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, R6 ?3 ?* z2 I# d# ~* J2 obear children
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1）生小孩
2）忍受孩子
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) c5 y4 o* p3 q- x+ s- y/ RJoke of Today
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' \2 e3 k; Q9 s    For the last company picnic, management decided that, due to liability issues, we could have alcohol, but only one drink per person.
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    I was fired for ordering the cups...
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(From Internet)

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) K# @+ ~: u5 s- ]$ `! Z* C: fThe picture is important:

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Joke of Today
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　　Man: Doctor, I'm getting very forgetful.
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: j( ^$ a' v! L! }0 G+ [- B( L　　Doctor: I see, Mr. Brown. Won't you take a chair?

　　Man: Thanks----take a what?
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8 z0 s6 v; `  E" d. c　　Doctor: A chair. Now, when did you first notice this trouble?
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　　Man: What trouble?
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2 U  P- P8 u+ m. A+ P0 z/ O3 h(From Internet)

Niederlassung

nice jokes!!